Saturday, 5 December 2015

If You Don’t Know What To Do Next In Your Life, Read These 5 Strategies

“It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive”. – Oriah Mountain Dreamer

There have been many times in my life where I have been stuck and not known what to do next. I have agonised over what I should do or not do and whether I was making the right choices.
This state of not knowing what to do next applies to all of us, at any age and at different stages of our lives. Whether we are heading off to university, graduating, choosing our career path, recovering from heart break, being made redundant, or entering into retirement, we all have a point in our lives where we don’t know what to do next.
The answers or solutions we seek vary according to where we are at in our lives. A young graduate will focus on answering this question in relation to their future and choosing the right career. A person entering into retirement will ask the question in the hope of solving the issue of doing something that has value in their life and a young mother recently divorced will be asking this question in the hope that she can find an answer that will enable her to survive another day.
Personally, I have discovered that following 5 steps will help you to find out what to do next in your life.

1. Put Your Running Shoes On and Clear Your Mind

“Not knowing what you want is a lot better than knowing exactly what you want but not being able to get it, at least you have hope.” – Unknown

At one time in my life, that was very challenging and emotional, all I could do was think about what I needed to do to get to the next day. There were no thoughts of what I wanted to do in the future nor were there any thoughts of how I wanted my life to be. It was just a matter of surviving from one day to the next.
If you are in this situation don’t panic, just focus on what you need to do to get through the day. For me, during this challenging time, exercise was the solution to helping me get through my day. Every morning my alarm would go off at 6am. I would have my running gear ready by the bed, I would get dressed, walk out the door and start running for 45 minutes. I would come back from my run, have a shower and my protein shake, then wait for the kids to wake up and my day would begin.
For a long time it was hard to get out of bed and go for my run because I just wanted to hide away. After a few months (yes it took that long) I began to realise that when I started my run I would feel terrible and then when I got to the end of my street I would start feeling better and the sick feeling in my stomach would disappear. Over time I began to look forward to my morning run as I felt more energised and I was sleeping better.
Recently I was talking to a healer about how I survived my life challenges and she said that exercise was one of the best ways to dissipate the emotional pain that we feel and hold in our bodies. She said that I was lucky to have found a solution that worked well for me, in that it enabled me to manage my emotional pain, so that I could move to the next stage of sorting out what I wanted to do next with my life.
It took me 12 months to reach a point where I was ready to look at my future. It was then, that my next phase of my journey began and I am happy to share with you how I discovered what I wanted to do with my life.

2. Take Action To Wake Up Your Conscious Mind

“Nobody is going to do your life for you. You have to do it yourself, whether you’re rich or poor, out of money or making it, the beneficiary of ridiculous fortune or terrible injustice. And you have to do it no matter what is true. No matter what is hard. No matter what is unjust, sad, sucky things befall you. Self pity is a dead end road. You can make the choice to drive down it. It’s up to you to decide to stay parked there or to turn around and drive out” – Cheryl Stryed.

Life isn’t predictable and the solutions we seek to answer our life questions don’t always come nicely wrapped. There are no rules to follow and we have to work hard to define our life pathway. Waking our conscious minds to accept our reality, embrace change and the unpredictability of life, is one step toward finding out what we need to do next in our life.
For me I had to deal with my limiting self beliefs which were very much a part of my conscious mind and my road blocks to moving forward. I couldn’t see a future for myself and I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted and making a decision as to what to do with my life was impossible. This was the hardest part for me, figuring out what I wanted, what I loved to do and how to be me or even believe in me.
I remember reading somewhere that if we have to make important decisions or choices in our lives, we can become overwhelmed and so we choose to do nothing – its just too hard. We become paralysed rather than liberated by the power of choice. Because I didn’t know what I wanted, I couldn’t make a decision as to what direction I wanted my life to go, so for a long time I did nothing and just drifted.
Eventually I became very dissatisfied with the direction my life was taking. I knew I had to take action and fast, because I had very little faith in myself, my confidence was low and my vision for my future was bleak. I was confused, conflicted and I had no hope.
My conscious mind was wanting solutions that were practical and safe, however my heart, well it wanted to follow my dreams. It is hard to follow your heart, to overcome your limiting self beliefs and find your power. However you can do it and it all comes down to taking action to change. Small steps at a time create the momentum for change.

3. Embrace the Power of Taking Small Steps with a 30 Day Challenge

The first step I took to reprogram my conscious mind – was I set myself a 30 Day Challenge. I wrote down 3 goals I wanted to achieve in 1 month that would make my life better than it was now. The 3 goals were: to lose 2 kg, to sign up and start training to run a marathon in 6 months time and to spend one weekend by myself writing my Life Vision. The first 2 goals were easy to achieve, however the 3rd one took me a lot longer to do but I did get there in the end.
This 30 day challenge gave me the momentum to begin my journey to finding out what I wanted to do with my life. Achieving these 3 goals gave me the confidence and self belief to keep going because I knew that if I did nothing then I would have to accept a life of disquiet, unhappiness, sadness and no hope. There was no way that was going to happen.

4. Seek The Wisdom and Knowledge of Others Who Have Been There Before.

“The more extensive a man’s knowledge of what has been done, the greater will be his power of knowing what to do” – Benjamin Disraeli

I like to read other people’s stories about how they lived their lives, their life philosophies and how they overcame their challenges in life. I find that their stories inspire and motivate me especially when I am unsure about what to do next in my life. These stories helped me to build my knowledge base so that I could sort out the confusion in my mind and in my heart, as to what I should do next. I have read many books, however for me, the two most inspiring books that I have read that helped me gain clarity and purpose in my life are Nelson Mandela’s book “The Long Walk to Freedom” and Richard Branson’s book “Screw It Lets Do It – Lessons in Life and Business”. These 2 books are very different but the life lessons that Nelson Mandela and Richard Branson shared are priceless.

5. Do What Ever It Takes To Get To Know YOU.

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” – Theodore Roosevelt.

Find out who you are, what your passions are and what you want to do with your life. This strategy is closely aligned to Strategy 2, in that you have to know who you are in order for you to Wake Up Your Conscious Mind.
To move forward you have to let go of your past and embrace change. With change comes reinvention and if you don’t know who you are and what you want, it makes it a lot harder to move forward in your life.
Having a Life Vision, knowing your purpose and how you want to live your life are the foundations to building belief in yourself, your confidence, resilience, courage and accountability. There will be times in your life where you may not know what to do next, or you will make the wrong decision and that is okay. With a purpose and a vision when these situations occur you wont be paralysed by the fear of not knowing what to do, you will seize it as an opportunity to experience life. If it doesn’t work out that’s still okay because you will be empowered to make another choice.
My first step toward knowing what I wanted in life was to commit to my 30 day challenge – setting and achieving 3 goals in 1 month. Once I did that, then I started to organise my world and I researched for ways where I could get to know me, my purpose, my passions and how I wanted to live my life. It took some time (2-3 years) but I did get there. I’ve read books, I’ve searched the web, I’ve talked to people and I’ve attended personal development workshops until I found a programme that I thought was right for me. I didn’t have my Life Plan perfectly worked out, but when my next life challenge presented itself to me I was far more prepared, informed and resilient to dealing with challenge. It still hurt and it was very emotional but through it all I knew what I needed to do next to move forward in my life.
If you don’t know what to do next in your life consider these strategies I have shared. It is a tough journey but it is also rewarding, in that you will discover your life purpose and your passion. You will know what you need to do in your life and the actions you need to take to get there!

“Look back upon your life and ask: What up to now have you truly loved, what has raised your soul, what ruled it and at the same time made you happy? Line up these objects of reverence before you, and see how they form a ladder on which you have so far climbed up toward your true self.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

Featured photo credit: me_on_flickr via flickr.com

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Kathryn Sandford

Kathryn Sandford is a writer, speaker and coach on reinvention and change. To thank her followers on Life Hack for a LIMITED TIME Kathryn is giving away her ebook Practical Ways To Live A Life You Love for FREE CLICK HERE to get it instantly.

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THE MINDSET OF PEOPLE WHO BECOME HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL IN THEIR 20s

People Who Become Highly Successful In Their 20s Have These 6 Mindsets In Common

Productivity Successby Djordje Todorovic

Authority, influence, and solid income — these are labels which seem to define highly successful individuals. Achieving a higher status, fame, and abundant resources requires a certain mindset.
We have all seen or heard how certain people managed to accumulate great wealth, or simply how they became renowned individuals — but what was truly on their mind? The truth is that they had an idea on to improve something they loved, and possibly impress everyone else who shared the same interest. This brings up a different question – what is the true criteria for being highly successful? Is it having substantial revenue, or showing the world what you are good at? I believe that it is the latter, and that money and fame simply come with the territory.
The mindset must never be excluded from the equation, and as far as highly successful people are concerned, these are the mindsets they share.

1. They had a vision and made constant efforts to realize it – Mark Zuckerberg

We have all heard about or seen the movie The Social Network, so we have an idea about how Facebook came to be. Mark is a genius and he had a vision of an online place where people could easily socialize and stay in touch. Creating such a place was no easy task, but he knew success would bring a great deal of appreciation. He knew that it was a vision worth realizing.
If you are a creative visionary, and are skilled in a particular area, think hard about what you can do with your talents. Think about how to challenge and utilize them in a way that will bring a sense of achievement. Think about how you can do something which will improve the community as a whole — your efforts will not go unnoticed. Without such drive, you are reduced to only daydreaming about how to impress someone with the idea, rather than thinking about what it takes to make it a reality. It is not enough to have vision — you must also find a way to share it.
Never allow your governing passion to rust — hone and nourish the skills you have. Learn from others and come up with something new you can share with the world. This is how you can become highly successful and admired.

2. They allowed their suffering to drive their motivation — Elizabeth Holmes

Moments of great suffering and sadness make up our core memories. How we cope in these situations can reveal who we really are. For Elizabeth Holmes, it was the death of her uncle that drove her ambition to help humanity. She has come up with a device that is capable of monitoring one’s health and detecting disease before it fully develops. Now, she is one of the youngest billionaires in the world in the world, and her product can save lives.
This kind of mindset is important not only for success, but for life in general. The truth is that life is filled with hardships, and if we can’t endure, we lose. We become deeply insecure, apathetic, and depressed. However, if we work towards regaining control, then we come out scarred but stronger. If you ever find yourself in a situation that makes you feel helpless, don’t dwell on it — focus on what you can do to make things better.

3. They focused on what their audience wanted — Felix Arvid Ulf Kjellberg A.K.A. PewDiePie

Whenever someone gives you a dirty look and tells you that you are wasting your time playing video games, tell them about PewDiePie. The gaming industry is vast, not everyone can afford to play every game. Now, you can decide whether or not a game is worth the money before you buy. This is thanks to online streaming, or “Let’s Play” videos. It has become widely popular, but one person who explored this trend and managed to earn money, simply because he liked playing video games, was PewDiePie.
Truth be told, a lot of viewers find him immature, childish, and annoying. Still, Felix has a huge fanbase of subscribers, simply because he never failed to deliver what his initial audience wanted — insight about gaming and games in general. This kind of mindset is important for any entertainer and provider — you need to listen to the feedback of your audience in order to perfect your performance or services. Otherwise, someone else will exploit your weakness and steal your consumers, simply because you weren’t guided by the principles of good customer service.
In other words, if you are not doing something unique and complex, then you are not irreplaceable. You need work on forming a strong relationship of loyalty with your audience. After all, this is why PewDiePie is still very popular — he stayed loyal to his initial fan base.

4. They nourished their creativity — Jonathan Koon

Sometimes, being unique and original without the intention to change the world can do the trick. Jonathan Koon was just a teenager when he started nourishing his creativity for car fashion, and managed to accumulate a lot of money from it. Then, he became one of the suppliers of the show Pimp My Ride, which was a way to help out the community and gain publicity at the same time. Afterwards, he became a fashion designer, an industry he still works in today.
Jonathan had the commodity of a young age, and was fortunate enough to discover his talent during his youth. If you are good at something, devote at least one day per week to nourishing that creativity. This kind of mindset is important if you intend to become highly successful one day. It is true that we might not always have the time to practice what we are good at, but probably possible to find some free time during the weekend. This allows us to feel truly productive, filling us with positive energy. Without this kind of devotion, there is a risk that you will feel trapped and unfulfilled. After all, our hobbies are part of who we are — our own spark of individuality.

5. They never lost hope, instead working hard and remaining patient — Bruce Lee

“Highly successful” does not always imply wealth — very often it simply means being the best at something, and in this case it is martial arts. Bruce Lee is the undisputed champion when it comes to fighting techniques, and no matter how you look at it, this is sheer success. He showed the world the potential of the human body. One of his most memorable quotes was “Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.”
The truth is, hard work and determination will get you through the most difficult times in your life. Struggles teach us to be resourceful and find a way out of a difficult situation. If you are going through a financial crisis, there is always a way to manage your finances — you can try doing something as a freelancer on numerous online platforms, you can do surveys online and get some money, you can give English lessons via Skype, among many other options. These are not permanent solutions, but they can help you manage.
The ability to efficiently cope during hard times is essential for highly successful people. It shows them what options are available, it helps when constructing contingency plans and exit strategies. Such a mindset will result in greater confidence and a sense of security. Without it, you’ll be constantly overwhelmed with the fear of losing your assets, which always results in health issues.

6. They challenged the popular beliefs and pushed the limits – Steve Jobs

When we are talking about highly successful people who made crucial decisions at a young age, Steve Jobs is an inevitable mention. He, Mark Zuckerberg, and Elizabeth Holmes exemplify the American Dream — just like the very inventor of the concept, Benjamin Franklin. The problem is that these situations make one into a role model, and idealizing others can have a negative impact on your mind. It is not uncommon to try mimicking the behavior of your paragons, thinking that it will somehow get you closer to their mindset. With that being said, it is quite clear that forsaking school and education is not a part of the mindset, it simply happened because Steve Jobs wanted to pursue his well-established vision.
When you decide to challenge established norms and try to go against the curve, make sure you have a well-supported plan. Deciding to become a drop-out and waiting for brilliance and fame to appear miraculously is a flawed belief. Think every major decision through. Weigh the pros and cons before you make major decisions — after all, recklessness is not a virtue. However, it is also important to mention that hesitation can result in regrets, so always strive to find a balance between the two.

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10 THINGS EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW IN LIFE

What are the 10 things we need to know in life? “Life is short, you need to…blah blah blah….” I knew this already, anything I haven’t been informed yet?

1. Realize that nobody cares, and if they do, you shouldn’t care that they care.

Got a new car? Nobody cares. You’ll get some gawkers for a couple of weeks—they don’t care. They’re curious. Three weeks in it’ll be just another shiny blob among all the thousands of others crawling down the freeway and sitting in garages and driveways up and down your street. People will care about your car just as much as you care about all of those. Got a new gewgaw? New wardrobe? Went to a swanky restaurant? Exotic vacation? Nobody cares. Don’t base your happiness on people’s caring, because they won’t. And if they do, they either want your stuff or hate you for it.

2. Some rulebreakers will break rule number one.

Occasionally, people in your life will defy the odds and actually care about you. Still not your stuff, sorry. But if they value you, they’ll value that you value it, and they’ll listen. When you talk about all of those things that nobody else cares about, they will look into your eyes and consume your words, and in that moment you will know that every part of them is there with you.

3. Spend your life with rulebreakers.

Marry them. Befriend them. Work with them. Spend weekends with them. No matter how much power you become possessed of, you’ll never be able to make someone care—so gather close the caring.

4. Money is cheap.

I mean, there’s a lot of it—trillions upon trillions of dollars floating around the world, largely made up of cash whose value is made up and ascribed to it, anyway. Don’t engineer your life around getting a slightly less tiny portion of this pile, and make your spirit of generosity reflect this principle. I knew a man who became driven by the desire to amass six figures in savings, so he worked and scrimped and sacrificed to get there. And he did… right before he died of cancer. I’m sure his wife’s new husband appreciated his diligence.

5. Money is expensive.

I mean, it’s difficult to get your hands on sometimes—and you never know when someone’s going to pull the floorboards out from under you—so don’t be stupid with it. Avoid debt on depreciating assets, and never incur debt in order to assuage your vanity (see rule number one). Debt has become normative, but don’t blithely accept it as a rite of passage into adulthood—debt represents imbalance and, in some sense, often a resignation of control. Student loan debt isn’t always avoidable, but it isn’t a given—my wife and I completed a combined ten years of college with zero debt between us. If you can’t avoid it, though, make sure that your degree is an investment rather than a liability—I mourn a bit for all of the people going tens of thousands of dollars in debt in pursuit of vague liberal arts degrees with no idea of what they want out of life. If you’re just dropping tuition dollars for lack of a better idea at the moment, just withdraw and go wander around Europe for a few weeks—I guarantee you’ll spend less and learn more in the process.